


Memory From A Heart

by mcuwhore



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, Car Accidents, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Bucky Barnes, M/M, Married Couple, Memory Loss, Slow Burn, the vow - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-10
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-10-07 13:31:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17366765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcuwhore/pseuds/mcuwhore
Summary: Steve and Bucky are happy together, they just got married and things couldn't look easier.When suddenly a car accident changes all of their lives.





	Memory From A Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, hello everyone! This is my first time ever writing anything at all, so please be kind with me, thank you. I still haven't decided if I want to purse this thing completly, I'm posting this first chapter to see how it goes and only afterwards I'll decide if it's worth continuing. This is based on the movie "The Vow" (2012) and there's some dialogue directly copied from it. I would really like to know what you think about it, it's really important to me.  
> Please note that English is not my first language, so forgive ANY mistake I might have made, I'm here to practice and improve. Leave a kudo or a comment if you liked this (of course) or if you simply want this to continue. Thank you and enjoy!

“Oh, wow” says Steve as soon as they step out in the freezing air, holding Bucky close to his side, one of his partner’s hand in his coat pocket to keep it warm. 

“It’s always so beautiful, isn’t it?” Bucky replies turning his head from the wide expanse of snow ahead of them to his lover’s face, curling his lips in a soft smile seeing how amazed Steve looks. It was only raining when they entered the theatre, nothing unusual for New York weather. But now rain froze into snow and the road is now covered in a soft white blanket.

They had a different opinion of snow, but some shared memories in it that are always lovely to relive every time the weather lets them. They used to play in the snow when they were children: Bucky, without a care in the world, would always do angels in it and try to get Steve to do the same, to join him by throwing snowballs at his back. On the other hand, Steve would always be unsure of the icy thing, afraid to get a cold after a few moments outside because of his stupid weak immune defense system. But how could he say no to that little happy boy he loved so much? And after all, Bucky would take care of him: not letting him outside for too long, always pushing his hat low on his head to protect his ears and then getting him inside and preparing him a hot chocolate with mini marshmallows to warm his little body quickly.  
They have always been lucky to have each other. They would always make the day brighter to one another.

Bucky cuddles a little closer to Steve after being hit by some freezing wind and immediately the other answers by tightening his grip on his hand and lowering his eyes to his. “We should hurry up and get to the car. I think a hot chocolate with mini marshmallows is waiting for us home.” At his words, Bucky nods excitedly in agreement, smiles and start pulling him in the fresh snow towards their car.

As soon as they reach it, Bucky gets inside while watching Steve cleaning off the snow on the front view window with is huge gloved hands, but he soon reach him inside and pull the gloves off to take the other’s hands in his and blowing some hot air on them with his breath while chuckling lightly. 

“You’re an idiot, your hands are freezing!” Bucky fake-complains without pulling his hands away from Steve’s but watching him straight in those deep-as-the-ocean blue eyes.

“They are, but do you wanna feel how freezing my lips are?”

“Mr Rogers, are you trying to flirt with me?” Bucky raises a hand over his chest in faked astonishment but is soon interrupted by Steve’s frozen lips on his – that aren’t that warm  
either – and they both end up chuckling over the other’s mouth.

 

***

 

Steve shuffles with the radio stations, finding it hard to get a working one due to the bad weather, and stops as soon he hears a slow drum playing, curling his lips in a smile so little Bucky couldn’t have noticed, and then starting to hum lightly to the melody.

Bucky frowns a little and turns his gaze to the radio, trying to recognize the music.

_"I've never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight  
I've never seen you shine so bright"_

“Oh my god, Rogers no, please!” he burst out in a loud laugh as he recognize the song and Steve starts to actually singing under his breath. “C’mon you hate this song!” Bucky continues without stopping from laughing.

“I don’t! We also danced to it at our wedding, don’t you remember?”

“That was only because my ma is obsessed with this cheesy stuff, not because you like it!” At his words, Steve brings a hand up and raises his eyebrows, knowing that Bucky got him cornered there.

_"I've never seen so many men ask you if you wanted to dance_  
_They're looking for a little romance, given half a chance_  
_And I have never seen that dress you're wearing_  
_Or the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes_  
_I have been blind"_

As the song keeps on going, Steve takes his chance and raises his voice to start singing properly, getting his eyes on Bucky’s the more possible and pinching his eyebrows in the center of his forehead to convey the cheesy words he’s singing.

_"The lady in red is dancing with me, cheek to cheek."_

By the time Steve is singing so loudly, trying to achieve all the high notes in off-key high-pitched noises. Bucky is laughing so loudly that he can’t help but stop the car to calm down and get their breaths together.

They are still laughing, now more lightly, something more like a chuckle, that Bucky gets his hand on Steve’s tight and unfasten his seatbelt to try to get a little closer to him. 

“You’re a punk, and I love you so fuckin’ much” Bucky whispers getting closer to his ear, placing a little kiss on his neck that causes a little moan from Steve’s throat, and he lays his head on the headrest relaxing a bit with his husband’s lips placing light kisses on the length of his neck.

When suddenly, out of nowhere, an hard push comes from behind, forcing Steve to bend harshly on the steering wheel and hitting badly his head to it, but mostly kept on place thanks to the strong seatbelt that squeeze him uncomfortably across his chest, pushing all of the air out of his lungs. His sight starts to darken at the edges, the world spinning quickly around him and he manages to whisper a quiet “Buck…?” before zoning out completely with his head on the steering wheel.

What he couldn’t have notice is that Bucky’s seatbelt wasn’t there to do his job, and now the boy was totally unconscious, laid on his belly on the front of the car, completely thrown out from the front window, millions of pieces of glasses all around him and a deep cut on his forehead that kept bleeding on their car. 

 

***

 

Next thing Steve knows is that he’s in a white and blue-ish room, a loud bang in his head and too many needles craving into his skin. He turns his head around, looking for clarity, to understand what happened and he catches sight of a nurse walking quickly towards him, noticing that he is finally awake.

“Good morning, Mr Rogers! Or should I say, good evening” the nurse approaches him with a soft smile and starts controlling the monitors around him and his IV.

“I’m in the hospital.” Steve says groggily, his throat harsh for some reason.

“Yes, you are, Sherlock. You had a pretty bad accident two nights ago. Luckily for you, nothing major in matter of damage. You had a minor head concussion, but now everything is fine, you just gotta deal with that sling for your arm for some da--” The nurse starts ranting stuff that Steve can’t quite understand, one name banging in his head louder.

“W-Where is Bucky?” “Excuse me?” The nurse turns his head towards him and looks at him a little confused, but immediately noticing the urgency in Steve’s question, as the man is looking at her like his life depends on her answer.

“My… my husband. Buck—I mean, James Barnes. He was in the car with me.” Steve tries as hard as he can to keep focused, the anesthetic still hitting on him, but fighting hard to keep calm; not an easy thing to do when your heart is racing that fast and every bone in his body is screaming at him that something is really wrong.

“Oh… yes, he’s here too. He’s just a few rooms awa-” Steve immediately sits up, as far as he can giving the position he’s in, and grabs the nurse’s hand in his, a little tighter than he intend to. “I need to see him.” A statement, not a question.

The nurse tries her best to calm him, squeezing his hand back and putting her other hand on his arm. “I’m really sorry, Mr Rogers, but I’m afraid you can’t see him. He… He got it pretty bad. He’s in medically induced coma in this very moment.”.

Steve’s eyes widen at her words, now definitely awake and alert about what she has to say. “H-how is he…?” The nurse takes his hand in hers and sits down next to him, keeping her eyes to her own lap.

“I’m a be real with you, Steve… can I call you Steve?” Steve barely nods, not daring to tear his eyes away from her face. “Honestly, the boy is lucky to be alive. He got here with a bad head concussion, went straight to surgery and kept there for the whole night. Now he’s asleep, and we don’t know for sure the outcome of the operation, but he’s stable and it went good. I guess we just need to wait, Steve.” She squeezes his hand and finally looks into his eyes, a soft and honest smile on her lips.

Steve can’t find the right words, can’t even find his voice for what it’s worth and just keeps on looking at her, his eyebrows pinched in the center in a hurt expression, and tries, without success, to swallow the biggest nod he ever felt in his throat. He needs to see him, he needs to see his Bucky, to grab his hand and kiss him on his forehead and whisper to him that he’s there and that everything is going to be alright, and that he will never leave him alone. That he’s strong and he’s gonna overcome this, that he loves him and always will. But he can’t, he knows he can’t. He sees it in the nurse’s eyes, he can’t leave his bed, not yet, and he has to leave Bucky alone, in an empty room, with his hands cold and no one there to keep him warm. Steve starts to panic, his sight blurring at the edges and every sound muffled to his ears. The nurse gets up from his bed to get him some anesthetic in him, and he feels the emptiness she leaves making him drown in the white sheets. He is drowning and he can’t move, he is going lower and lower, looking upwards, towards the sky, towards safety. And all he sees is Bucky’s face, smiling at him and offering him his hand, but Steve just seems to not be able to take it.

He falls asleep again in that hospital bed, but his nightmares never leave him alone. He just keeps drowning.

 

***

 

It’s been four days from the accident when he finally has the permission to go and see Bucky. He is still sleeping, but as soon as Steve enters the room, he runs to his bed and his knees give out on him, that he end up kneeling beside Bucky’s bed, grasping his hand like his life depends on it. His hand is cold, as he expected it to be, and he tries as hard as he can to keep the tears from falling. He has to be strong for him.

“Hey, Buck, baby I’m here.” He places a kiss on his knuckles, smiling lightly, hoping Bucky could hear him, from wherever his mind is in that moment. Maybe he can get some comfort from his voice if he’s positive enough.

“I missed you so much, but I’m here now and I won’t leave your side until you wake up and tell me to get out of here and get a shower because I stink too much.” He chuckles lightly, raising a hand and moving a strand of hair from his forehead and pulling it gently behind his ear, revealing a big scar that runs all over his forehead, from the center and down to his temple. He brushes his fingertips to the scar, a touch light as a feather, afraid that he could hurt him. 

“You look beautiful, I promise. You still are the most beautiful thing that I have ever happen to seen. Please, Buck, come back to me. I need you. I miss you so much.” He can’t help but lower his head to their intertwined hands and let a little tear cross his cheek.

“I brought you something, baby.” He sniffs a little to get his stuff together and take his hand in his kindly. He slips a hand in his pocket and take out a ring from it. He very, very gently slips the ring to Bucky’s ring finger and smile slightly at the sight. “They had to took it away from you during the operation. But you never have to worry. I always got your back, I won’t let you forget that you’re my husband, Buck. I fought too hard to have you.” He smiles sadly and kisses the ring on his finger, thinking back to their times together in the past.

He spends the days like that, talking to him, holding his hand and kissing his forehead, waiting for him to come back to him.

 

***

 

“Don’t crowd him, he’s gonna be a little groggy so… let’s just give him some space” the nurse that was with Steve when he woke up is now standing beside him, at the end of Bucky’s bed. They’re both watching him slowly waking up from his long sleep. Steve is holding himself steady to the bar at the end of the bed, knuckles white from how hard he’s clenching at it.

“Hey…” Steve says low, a soft smile in his voice. “It’s so good to see you.” He bend his head lightly to one side looking at him, while Bucky moving his gaze from the nurse to Steve. He stops a moment to look him properly in the face, eyebrows pinched in a confused expression.

“Wh- wh..?” Bucky can’t seem to form any word properly, and just looks at the nurse with a question look in his eyes.

“James, it’s okay- ” starts the nurse “you’re in the hospital. You were in a car accident. You hit your head but you’re okay, we just kept you asleep for a little while.” He keeps on looking confused, looking around him to try to figure things out. Steve then speaks again, looking at him with a sad smile and a little pain in his eyes at the sight of his beloved so small and confused. “How are you feeling?”

“My-my head hurts.” Bucky mutters, definitely sounding groggily. “Yeah, that’s perfectly normal. I’ll go get you something for that” as the nurse turns to leave, Bucky speaks again, looking at Steve in the eyes.

“Was anyone else hurt, doctor?” Steve feels the lump in his throat fall to his stomach. He tries to stay calm and reasonable. He gives a little look at the nurse before turning again to Bucky. “You know who I am, don’t you?”

“Of course… you’re my doctor.” 

And here it goes everything. Steve’s world starts to shatter all around him. And he’s falling again. He’s falling but now there’s no Bucky offering his hand to bring him to safety, there’s no Bucky lounging towards him to keep him steady. Bucky turned his back to him and he’s just gone as the rest of the world is.

However, Steve still tries to keep calm, to ignore the voice in his head screaming and his heart pounding so hard that he can’t even hear himself breathing. He doesn’t really know if he’s breathing at all. He doesn’t even care. He only cares about Bucky, who, apparently, doesn’t recognize his face. Steve walks slowly to the chair beside Bucky’s bed, it actually feels like floating to him, but he tries to ignore it. Bucky follows him with his gaze that now seems scared. Steve tries to ignore that too. The hardest thing to ignore is when Bucky tears his hand away and far from Steve’s when Steve is trying to grab it. He squeezes his eyes hard before opening them again and watching him straight in the eyes.

“Bucky… I’m your husband.” He mutters in a whisper, not even sure if he could hear him or not from how low is tone was.

But Bucky heard him low and clear. And his expression was loud and clear too. He raises his hand and catches sight of the ring on his middle finger, and his face turns into something horrible to Steve’s eyes. He looks disgusted. He looks at him in the eyes again.

“Who the hell is Bucky?”

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, here we are. I know it's not much but this is not going to be a super long fic. I repeat, lemme know what you think, if I don't get enough attention, it's useless for me to continue writing this. So this chapter is an attempt. in any case, thank you again for reading!


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